In the high-stakes world of real estate, negotiation is more than just a skill – it’s an art. Whether you’re a buyer, seller, investor, or agent, understanding the psychology, strategy, and tactics behind successful deal-making can give you an undeniable edge. In an exclusive conversation with negotiation strategy expert at MINDsquared, Angela Barbazeni, we explored the core principles of negotiation and how they can be applied to the property market.
“Preparation is 90% of the Negotiation Process”
Entering any negotiation without a clear strategy is like stepping onto a battlefield without a plan. The first step is understanding the type of negotiation at hand – whether it’s a “win-lose” scenario, often a “zero-sum game”, or a “win-win” opportunity where collaboration can create value for both sides. As Angela explains,
“It’s very important to understand what variables are more important to me, what are the variables that are more important to you, how easy or difficult are they to give, how important are they for you to get, and how am I going to make them conditional.”
By increasing the number of variables at play, negotiators can shift away from rigid, adversarial bargaining toward a more collaborative approach. “If I share some information, you’re more inclined to share more information with me,” Angela notes, highlighting the power of trust-building. Ultimately, the most skilled negotiators recognise that success isn’t just about price – it’s about people, and in my circumstance, it’s the relationship I’ve garnered with selling agents over a decade in the industry.
The Psychology of Negotiation
Successful negotiation should always consider perception – and therefore the emotions, and psychology of other involved parties. As Angela explains,
“A deal can make sense financially, but the other party can still say no if they don’t feel satisfied with the deal.”
To illustrate this, she runs an exercise: I have five seconds to either accept or reject her offer. She has $100 – she keeps $90, and I receive $10. If I refuse, we both walk away with nothing. I accept, but as Angela points out, not everyone would. “Some people have a very strong sense of fairness,” she says. “They wouldn’t accept a deal that’s 60/40 or even 70/30 – anything that isn’t 50/50.”
Unlike a computer, which would “take even two cents over nothing”, humans negotiate with ego, emotion, and instinct. “During negotiations, you won’t always come across a rational person,” Angela explains, reminding us that stress can trigger a fight-or-flight response within a negotiation. That’s why preparation is crucial – anticipating how we will react when the other party says no – in my experience, this often occurs when the sellers of a home reject a price bid. “What you say, how you move” all contribute to the other party’s experience, ensuring they leave feeling that the deal was not just logical, but fair.
The Language of Successful Negotiators
The words you choose in a negotiation are just as important as the numbers on the table. “At all times, you need to sound like this is the best deal you can do,” Angela explains.
I find that moulding the language I use with different agents shapes their perception of the property and thus the price – even extremely subtle phrasing can influence the other party’s response.
For instance, Australians often default to “soft language,” using phrases like “happy to…” or “happy with…” – but as Angela points out, this unintentionally signals to another party that “deep down, I know this is a great deal for me.” Instead, a more effective approach is to convey effort and limitation: “This is tough for me…,” or “I will stretch myself…” – implying that any further concessions are unlikely.
I demonstrated this in practice: while inspecting a house in Bondi that was perfect for my client, I didn’t express enthusiasm. Instead, I choose to lead with, “I think this is going to be expensive.” The result? The real estate agents, eager to secure a deal, gave me the number first. Strategic language doesn’t just communicate value – it shapes the direction of the negotiation itself.
Who Should Go First?
The question of who should make the first move in a negotiation is often debated, I even change my stance depending on what I feel will be most beneficial for my clients, however Angela is clear: “You should go first, whatever the situation is.”
The reason? Value anchoring – once a number is heard, it subconsciously conditions the other party’s expectations. “It has a huge psychological effect,” Angela explains, as the opposing party will naturally adjust their position around the number you set, whether ambitiously high or strategically low. Many fear naming the wrong figure, but Angela reassures that with proper preparation, this risk is minimal – especially in an era where pricing information is readily available online.
Drawing from my own experience in property negotiation, I’ve seen this firsthand: initial price guides for properties often start high before adjusting downward. Angela underscores this notion stating that “Knowledge is power,” the more you research, the more control you have in a negotiation.
However, Angela offers a crucial warning – before negotiations even begin, “you must establish your walk-away points”. As deals become more complex and new variables arise, it’s easy to lose sight of your limits. Staying firm on your threshold ensures you remain in control, no matter how the negotiation unfolds. This is always central to my preparation, as the process of establishing these ‘walk-away points’ is always highly collaborative with my clients – ensuring we keep their dream home within their budget – and to remind them that if a homes price exceeds what’s reasonable for themselves – it is okay to walk away, and that there is an abundance of homes they’ll fall in love with.
Shifting the Balance of Power
Power in negotiation isn’t just about position – it’s about preparation. One of the simplest ways to gain an edge is to “ask a lot of questions” and “know who you’re dealing with.” Angela and I advise, even something as straightforward as looking someone up on LinkedIn can provide valuable insights. Another crucial factor is understanding the timeline -“How much time pressure do you have? How much time pressure do they have?” Time constraints can dramatically shift leverage, with Angela emphasizing, “The less time I have, the less power I have.”
This is especially crucial to be persistent with agents, because if the seller has already bought another home – they’ll be desperate to do a deal, almost always below my clients budget.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Ut elit tellus, luctus nec ullamcorper mattis, pulvinar dapibus leo.
However, the most important factor in power dynamics, Angela says, is the Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA). Having multiple fallback options – “Plan A, B, C, D, E, F, and G” – ensures you never negotiate from a place of desperation. “The more alternative options you have, the more power you have.”. In negotiation, power isn’t just about what’s on the table – it’s about knowing you have the freedom to walk away.
Final Thoughts
Don’t miss the full interview – it’s packed with expert strategies that can transform the way you negotiate.
Watch now and take your skills to the next level…
In the high-stakes world of real estate, negotiation is more than just a skill – it’s an art. Whether you’re a buyer, seller, investor, or agent, understanding the psychology, strategy, and tactics behind successful deal-making can give you an undeniable edge. In an exclusive conversation with negotiation strategy expert at MINDsquared, Angela Barbazeni, we explored the core principles of negotiation and how they can be applied to the property market.
“Preparation is 90%
of the Negotiation
Process”
Entering any negotiation without a clear strategy is like stepping onto a battlefield without a plan. The first step is understanding the type of negotiation at hand – whether it’s a “win-lose” scenario, often a “zero-sum game”, or a “win-win” opportunity where collaboration can create value for both sides. As Angela explains,
“It’s very important to understand what variables are more important to me, what are the variables that are more important to you, how easy or difficult are they to give, how important are they for you to get, and how am I going to make them conditional.”
By increasing the number of variables at play, negotiators can shift away from rigid, adversarial bargaining toward a more collaborative approach. “If I share some information, you’re more inclined to share more information with me,” Angela notes, highlighting the power of trust-building. Ultimately, the most skilled negotiators recognise that success isn’t just about price – it’s about people, and in my circumstance, it’s the relationship I’ve garnered with selling agents over a decade in the industry.
The Psychology of
Negotiation
Successful negotiation should always consider perception – and therefore the emotions, and psychology of other involved parties. As Angela explains,
“A deal can make sense financially, but the other party can still say no if they don’t feel satisfied with the deal.”
To illustrate this, she runs an exercise: I have five seconds to either accept or reject her offer. She has $100 – she keeps $90, and I receive $10. If I refuse, we both walk away with nothing. I accept, but as Angela points out, not everyone would. “Some people have a very strong sense of fairness,” she says. “They wouldn’t accept a deal that’s 60/40 or even 70/30 – anything that isn’t 50/50.”
Unlike a computer, which would “take even two cents over nothing”, humans negotiate with ego, emotion, and instinct. “During negotiations, you won’t always come across a rational person,” Angela explains, reminding us that stress can trigger a fight-or-flight response within a negotiation. That’s why preparation is crucial – anticipating how we will react when the other party says no – in my experience, this often occurs when the sellers of a home reject a price bid. “What you say, how you move” all contribute to the other party’s experience, ensuring they leave feeling that the deal was not just logical, but fair.
The Language of
Successful
Negotiators
The words you choose in a negotiation are just as important as the numbers on the table. “At all times, you need to sound like this is the best deal you can do,” Angela explains.
I find that moulding the language I use with different agents shapes their perception of the property and thus the price – even extremely subtle phrasing can influence the other party’s response.
For instance, Australians often default to “soft language,” using phrases like “happy to…” or “happy with…” – but as Angela points out, this unintentionally signals to another party that “deep down, I know this is a great deal for me.” Instead, a more effective approach is to convey effort and limitation: “This is tough for me…,” or “I will stretch myself…” – implying that any further concessions are unlikely.
I demonstrated this in practice: while inspecting a house in Bondi that was perfect for my client, I didn’t express enthusiasm. Instead, I choose to lead with, “I think this is going to be expensive.” The result? The real estate agents, eager to secure a deal, gave me the number first. Strategic language doesn’t just communicate value – it shapes the direction of the negotiation itself.
Who Should Go
First?
The question of who should make the first move in a negotiation is often debated, I even change my stance depending on what I feel will be most beneficial for my clients, however Angela is clear: “You should go first, whatever the situation is.”
The reason? Value anchoring – once a number is heard, it subconsciously conditions the other party’s expectations. “It has a huge psychological effect,” Angela explains, as the opposing party will naturally adjust their position around the number you set, whether ambitiously high or strategically low. Many fear naming the wrong figure, but Angela reassures that with proper preparation, this risk is minimal – especially in an era where pricing information is readily available online.
Drawing from my own experience in property negotiation, I’ve seen this firsthand: initial price guides for properties often start high before adjusting downward. Angela underscores this notion stating that “Knowledge is power,” the more you research, the more control you have in a negotiation.
However, Angela offers a crucial warning – before negotiations even begin, “you must establish your walk-away points”. As deals become more complex and new variables arise, it’s easy to lose sight of your limits. Staying firm on your threshold ensures you remain in control, no matter how the negotiation unfolds. This is always central to my preparation, as the process of establishing these ‘walk-away points’ is always highly collaborative with my clients – ensuring we keep their dream home within their budget – and to remind them that if a homes price exceeds what’s reasonable for themselves – it is okay to walk away, and that there is an abundance of homes they’ll fall in love with.
Shifting the Balance
of Power
Power in negotiation isn’t just about position – it’s about preparation. One of the simplest ways to gain an edge is to “ask a lot of questions” and “know who you’re dealing with.” Angela and I advise, even something as straightforward as looking someone up on LinkedIn can provide valuable insights. Another crucial factor is understanding the timeline -“How much time pressure do you have? How much time pressure do they have?” Time constraints can dramatically shift leverage, with Angela emphasizing, “The less time I have, the less power I have.”
This is especially crucial to be persistent with agents, because if the seller has already bought another home – they’ll be desperate to do a deal, almost always below my clients budget.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Ut elit tellus, luctus nec ullamcorper mattis, pulvinar dapibus leo.
However, the most important factor in power dynamics, Angela says, is the Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA). Having multiple fallback options – “Plan A, B, C, D, E, F, and G” – ensures you never negotiate from a place of desperation. “The more alternative options you have, the more power you have.”. In negotiation, power isn’t just about what’s on the table – it’s about knowing you have the freedom to walk away.
Final Thoughts
Don’t miss the full interview – it’s packed with expert strategies that can transform the way you negotiate.
Watch now and take your skills to the next level…
